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Joke of the Day

"Why doesn't anyone invite copyeditors to parties when we're such cool people out with whom to hang?"

"Make your own bacon by tricking a pig into running headlong through a harp."

"What's the dirtiest language? Latin, its absolutely filled with *cum*."

"Why did Tupac go to the gym? To get a sixpac! (Thank you 7th grade me)"

"What does a Buddhist monk say when ordering a subway sandwich? *Make me one with everything*"

"A man and a boy went into the woods at night... ... the boy says to the man, ""it's scary out here."" The man then replied, ""You think you're scared, I gotta walk out of here alone!"""

"Adding ""and sh!t"" to the end of a sentence to make it sound cooler and sh!t."

"Daddy long legs are the NBA players of spiders."

"Ok, Surgeon General, alcohol is bad for pregnant women. The warning label might be more effective stating alcohol causes pregnant women."

"How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but how in the hell did they get in there?"