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Joke of the Day

"How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke her face. I'll see myself out."

"Way to bring me down, security questions. Dad's birthday? First pet? What's next? Gonna ask about Marco Black rejecting me in 2nd grade?"

"Can a ninja throw a star? Shur-He-Can"

"You're telling me, a chicken fried this rice"

"Why are sewer covers called manholes? If they were called womanholes, guys would keep trying to get in."

"I went to the shops to get eight cans of sprite. But when i was walking back i realized Id only picked 7 up"

"What does dog poo and women have in common ? The older they get the easier they are to pick up."

"To the guy who named cotton candy: Yes! It looks just like it sounds. To the guy who named Milk Duds: What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Ran into the apple store and used their bathroom .... iPeed"

"What did the Momma buffalo say to the baby buffalo on his first day of school? Bye Son (Bison)"