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Joke of the Day

"doctor looking at his iPad: oh no, this isn't good ... Me: give it to me straight doc what is it doctor: well, I forgot my wifi password"

"What did the bra say to the hat? ""I've got these two covered, you go on a head."""

"Cop: do u have anything illegal in the vehicle Me: *thinks about all the drugs in the car* no Cop: why did you just say asterisk thinks abo"

"How many redditors does it take to send a letter? Three. One to post it, and two to repost it."

"He asked: how do you feel about sex? She replied: Well i like it infrequently. He said: is that one word or two?"

"One I just made up. Did you hear about the dyslexic mafia? They all pay homage to the Dog Farther"

"A Termite Walks Into A Bar and Asks, ""Is the Bar Tender Here?"""

"i think a group of white people should be called a brunch."

"Ladies, are you having wine? Don't be shy. Let us know about it on all of your social media websites."

"My new thesaurus is terrible. Not only that but it's also terrible."