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Joke of the Day

"if u watch snowfall backwarbds, its abot the ground disolving into the sky to reveal the complex world it was hiding beneath it"

"What do you call it when people want to have sex while camping? Intense intents in tents."

"My dick was in the Guinness book of records... Until the librarian throw me out."

"Been waiting at the bar for my wife to pick me up for hours now. How long does it take to have a baby, for fuck sake!!!!!"

"I don't know about Michael J. Fox... His last few performances have been kind of shaky."

"A German man was hitting on my sister-in-law... I told her ""He wants to put his wiener in your schnitzel."" She replied ""Not happening, I guess he'll be stroganoff."""

"No, No, people. It's okay. I can make racist jokes. One of my best friends is a racist."

"I put the Christmas tree in our bed. Hopefully my wife will be okay with us having a treesome."

"Mexican magician A Mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, ""uno, dos..."" *poof*... He disappered without a tres."

"How do you prove that your dog loves you more than your wife? Lock them both in the trunk of the car for an hour, then open it up and see which one of them is happier to see you."