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Joke of the Day

"Q: Did you hear about the blonde that invented the solar flashlight?"

"An eagle gets sick and is arrested ... because, he is ill-eagle"

"I had my prostate examined the other day. After it was all over, the doctor left at the same time the nurse came in, and whispered the three words no one wants to hear. Who was that?"

"Why do Jewish men get circumcised? Because Jewish women won't touch anything that isn't at least 30 percent off"

"Why do programmers always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up? Because DEC 25 = OCT 31"

"Someone once told me my best features were my smile and personality If I don't have a mouth I'm fucked"

"Dear Alcohol, we had a deal. u were suppose 2 make me funnier, smarter & put me in a good mood.... I saw the photos - we need to talk."

"If you're a monkey, your shit's always bananas."

"Why don't you ever see black people on cruises? They'll never be tricked into that one again..."

"I think my girlfriend is being stalked... ...because I've been seeing people behind her back."