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Joke of the Day

"If I had a penny for every Trump joke being made right now I would have a small loan of a million dollars"

"[lost in Spain] Wife: ask that man where we are Me [pretending to speak Spanish with a local]: gracias Wife: well? Me: we are in Spain"

"The first rule of breast club is you having them and that's good enough for me."

"What do Muslim children color with? A Quran"

"If you cross a telephone and a pair of scissors what do you get? Snippy answers."

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl use the restroom? Because the *p* is silent"

"whips out Motorola razr and texts mom ""drive me to hot topic or none of my friends will love me"""

"I need farmer jokes I'm doing a speech at the Christmas party and they are farmers....I want to make fun of them"

"What do skeletons like to put on their meat? Grave-y."

"How did the Jew get a free cab ride? He blew the shofar."