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Joke of the Day

"Why didn't Jesus get into college? He got hung up on the boards."

"YOU make some noise. You're the one with the band and the microphone."

"What comes after fear but ends before sex? Funf!"

"girls you can't take a picture in slutty clothing and glasses and label it ""nerd lol"" you're not a nerd, you're a whore who found glasses."

"How do you drown a hipster? Throw them in the mainstream"

"Sesame Street didn't prepare me for any of this bullshit."

"What did I do before Twitter? Well, there's my family and......OH MY GOD WHERE'S MY FAMILY?!?!"

"Did you know that if you squint at a cat and it squints back, it's the cat's way of saying ""What the f are you looking at?!"""

"There is no doubt in my mind, I would trade my ovaries for another liver."

"Octopus How does an octopus make you laugh? With ten-tickles"