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Joke of the Day

"What's the first step in making Bronco cookies? Beat em in a bowl for three hours."

"I need to get something off my chest... It's called breast cancer. I'm so sorry."

"When I die I want to go like my grandfather did, peacefully in his sleep. Not like his terrified passengers."

"I win most of my staring contests... ... because my opponents usually don't know they're playing."

"Why do girls get so moody when they're on their periods? It's such an ovary action."

"- Judy, you have such a great taste! - Steve, stop biting me!"

"A Canadian and a Saudi Arabian had a baby... They named it Yasir Youbetcha"

"I used to collect old broken pocket watches.. But now I barely have the time."

"I never expected my dad to steal from his road construction job... but when I got home all of the signs were there."

"what would Netflix even do if i sent them back a DVD of me doing karate they'd have no choice but to add it to their collection i suppose"