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Joke of the Day

"If a woman asks you to guess her age, always subtract 10 years from your estimate. IMPORTANT: Do NOT do this if she's in her early twenties."

"My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake. I feel better already."

"Wife asks his husband how many women he had slept with... Husband proudly replies, ""Only you darling!"" ""With the others I was awake..."""

"What do Bernie Sanders supporters call their parents? Roommates"

"Sometimes you just have to grab the bull by the balls before you realize ""This can't be right."""

"I like when websites ask ""HOW DID YOU HEAR ABOUT US?"" Haha paranoid much?"

"Free Tibet I'LL TAKE IT!"

"What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot ""you racist"""

"Why are cats so afraid of cucumbers? Because they're 96% water"

"I was waiting in line for soup at my favorite Vietnamese food truck... When this guy pushes in front to place his order. I'm like, ""Dude, pho queue."""