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Joke of the Day

"Q: Why didn't the blondes go to the movies on one buck night? A: They couldn't fit a deer into the car."

"It's not about how she looks, it's all about how she looks at you."

"What do you have when you just used the toilet and realized there's no toilet paper? A real mess on your hands."

"So a finch asks his mother... ""Mom, why does my beak look different than yours?"" She replies, ""Well son, I hate to break it to you, but you're adapted."""

"How do you confuse an asian? Put a steering wheel in front of them"

"Ha - mildly amusing Haha - funny Hahaha - sarcastic laugh Hahahaha - stayin' alive"

"How flies does it take to screw in light bulb? Just two."

"If you think marijuana doesn't kill you've obviously never read the bible. People getting stoned to death left and right."

"I was wondering why I wasn't picking up any chicks recently, but then I realized my Monster energy sticker fell off my car"

"What's the last thing that goes through a fly's mind when it hits a car windscreen? Its arse."