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Joke of the Day

"In 2009 we lost Michael Jackson. Now we lost Neil Armstrong. We are running out of moon walkers"

"INTERVIEWER: And why under skills did you put ""has dominion over bees""? ME: [covered in bee stings] You can cross that one off"

"El chiste! Did you hear about the Mexican serial killer? He had Loco motives."

"How does a train eat? It goes chew chew."

"Apparently the same firm rents buildings to both ISIS and Neo-Nazis. You could say they're the lessor of two evils."

"How does someone pay for a painting? With Monet"

"Someone stole all the toilets from Scotland Yard Police have nothing to go on."

"How many bodybuilders does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to do it, a second to keep yelling, ""You're lookin' BIG, man!"""

"Three steps to start a relationship. 1- buy a sheep 2- name it ""relation"" 3- now you have a relationsheep."

"it's hard to retire if you are in the tire business it seems like you have more work to do."