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Joke of the Day

"Why do Canadians love Syrian Refugees? more moslem guys who can convert canadian girls to islam. What a deal!"

"How to survive a beat attack Run faster than your wife and kids"

"Table for six please? ""Is your party coming soon or?"" [Takes 4 turtles and a rat out from coat] I'm going to need booster seats"

"I feel a burst of superiority when I trick a fly into flying out of my car window."

"What has 9 arms and sucks? Def Leppard"

"If you want to hide your face, go out naked."

"What's worse than raining cats and dogs? Hailing taxis"

"A lifetime of fire drills has prepared me to completely ignore the alarm during a real fire."

"Why a man should ever want to marry a woman is a mystery. Why a man should ever want to marry 2 women is a bigamistery."

"I believe in strict gun control [gun sneaks toward front door] Where do you think you're going at this hour? [gun hangs head & turns around]"