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Joke of the Day

"If you want to hide your face, go out naked."

"did you hear about that kidnapping in Texas? He woke up."

"Toilet stolen from police station Cops have nothing to go on."

"What tends to satisfy thirst the most? Waterboarding."

"The school phoned me today and said, ""Your son's been telling lies."" I replied, ""Well, tell him he's bloody good - I ain't got any kids!"""

"You know what's good about pirate hookers? You can splooge in her good eye and run away without paying."

"How to avoid clickbait? clearly, you wouldn't know..."

"So a circumference walks into a restaurant... ...sits down and orders a bowl of diameter ice cream. The waiter asks, ""You want pie with that?"""

"What do you call it when you get an erection at a funeral? Mourning Wood."

"Officer: madam swimming is prohibited in this lake. Lady: then why dint you tell me when I was removing my clothes? Officer: well, that's not prohibited."