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Joke of the Day
"How are pirates like pimps? They both have gold teeth and say ""yo ho!"""
Next Joke
"OMG! My boss has choked on his sandwich and stopped breathing!! Should I call an ambulance? Its been 16hrs.. I didn't wanna make a fuss."
"What's Hodor's job? Raisin Bran"
"Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he's a fungi."
"My brother just updated his status to ""I love my girlfriend <3"". I always knew he liked them young, but that is fucking ridiculous."
"[first date] ""Tell me two interesting things about yourself"" well I lie when I'm nervous... ""ok..."" and I invented oatmeal"
"Of all my mistakes, you were the mistakiest"
"Some guy scared me after class and I dropped all my notes He scared me sheet-less."
"The swedish word ""gratrunka"" means 'crying while masturbating'. Guess you can say its a... real tear jerker."
"[doctors] ""How long have I got?"" ""Not long. Two, three months"" [casually places apple on desk] ""Ok, ok, six. Just get that out of here!"""