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Joke of the Day

"I'd like to take a moment to thank everyone who took time out of her or his busy schedule to tell me, ""omg you look like hell."""

Next Joke
 
"optimists don't jack off... ...they jack on"
"What did the horse say when it fell down? Help! I've fallen and I can't giddy up!"
"What happens when you put Nutella on salmon? You get salmonella"
"What do Chefs and Murderers have in common? The best ones clean up after themselves"
"A Storm Trooper and a Red Shirt get into a fight. Storm Trooper misses every shot. Red Shirt dies anyways."
"What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowtin"
"what do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!"
"You guys hear that Bono fell off the stage at the big U2 concert last night? He got a little too close to the edge."
"I've been really impressed by igloos. They're all white houses."