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Joke of the Day
"Accordion to studies... Most people don't replace the first word of a sentence with an instrument"
Next Joke
"Did you hear what they found in Justin Bieber's urine sample? Marijuana, prescription pills, alcohol, and Flintstones vitamins"
"What do you call a group of grandmothers making out with each other? A bunch of bi Nanas."
"I decided to put some ketchup in my eyes... ...but in Heinzsight, it wasn't a good idea."
"Did you hear about the guy who got his whole left side cut off? He's all right now"
"Request: dead baby jokes What is worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees Sure, oldest one in the book but whatever lets hear what you got gang"
"Everyone is entitled to my opinion."
"just met a guy who's using an empty beef jerky bag as a wallet so don't worry you're probably doing just fine"
"What do old people always keep in their back pocket? Depends."
"When I was a kid, my parents gave me a drum set for Christmas. They let me bang them as long as it wasn't after midnight. They always slept better after being banged."