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Joke of the Day

"Imagine a shark eating pizza. Imagine you were frog. Imagine a donkey wearing a skirt. Imagine someone telling you to imagine stupid things."

"Why was Freddie Mercury a great front-man for Queen? He could perform ""Under Pressure""."

"Matt Schaub and Eli Manning walk into a bar. What happened? They order a beer sampler and the bartender tells them to pick 6."

"DID YOU KNOW: If every person on the planet lined up along the Earth's equator, most of them would drown."

"Daddy, what's for dinner? ""did you have cereal for breakfast?"" No ""then cereal"""

"There was a kidnapping in my neighborhood today... So i woke him up."

"My penis was in the Guinness Book of World Records. Until the library kicked me out...."

"Two Cows are scared of getting mad cow disease A cow walks up to another cow and asks ""Are you scared of Mad Cow Disease?"" He replies, shocked ""No, I'm a Duck."""

"Why did the Aggie call 911 in the car wash? - He thought he saw the rotating car washer as a tornado"

"The first of Jay-Z's 99 problems is the obsessive compulsive disorder that requires him to know his precise number of problems at all times."