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Joke of the Day

"When life gives you melons... ... you might be dyslexic."

"A Mexican went into a Japanese restaurant and ordered but only to be disappointed when he was served with a live Octopus slammed in his plate. He asked for a taco."

"I'm really good in bed.....I stay on my side and rarely steal all the covers."

"Knock knock (Me -Knock knock) (You-Whos there) (Me-Dew) (You-Drew who) (Me-Drew pecock) Say it fast ^"

"What's the difference between purple and pink? The grip."

"What did Nietzsche call his Yiddish cab driver? An Uber mensche."

"What happens when Anthony Weiner tries to shake someones hand? They think long and hard before they touch weiner."

"Why did the sperm cross the road? Because you put on the wrong sock this morning."

"I heard oxygen and magnesium were dating And I was like OMG"

"There's a girl that I hate in my office that's white but looks like 'Precious'. I've been calling her ""Pressure"" & blaming my farts on her."