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Joke of the Day

"What did Nietzsche call his Yiddish cab driver? An Uber mensche."

"I knew my camping holiday was doomed when I saw the people at the next pitch struggling with a torn ground sheet and bent pegs. It was a portent."

"My father had a stroke he's all right now."

"My plan if there is a draft: Put a coat on."

"Why do 95% of black males like sex in the shower? The other 5% aren't in jail."

"50 shades of grey = my Liver"

"Today is the best day to propose to your girl... If she accept, its your luck! If not, tell her its April fools!"

"I owe my love of bukkake all to my dad When I was a child, he really rubbed off on me."

"I shut down my computer in the middle of an iTunes update and I think Siri just sent a Terminator back in time to kill teenage me."

"The Milli Vanilli Tour has been cancelled... They blamed it on the rain"