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Joke of the Day

"I'm on a plane with the dad from Home Alone and it's taking all my strength to not scream ""WE FORGOT KEVIN!"""

"Bank ads make me want to hide my money under my mattress. They also make me want to acquire some money for hiding, but that's a side issue."

"Why doesn't Magneto wear his old costume anymore? Because days of fuchsia passed"

"Whats a Porn Stars Favorite Drink? 7up in cider."

"Why does the Pirate Wear Camouflage Underwear? To hide his booty."

"I bet OJ Simpson's friends were really confused when his answer to F/Marry/Kill was ""Yes."""

"Why does Mexico never get gold medals in olympics? Because all their swimmers, runners, and high jumpers are in USA."

"What did the baby say to its mom after breastfeeding? Thanks for the mammaries!"

"What did the urologist say to his patient who forgot to take his medication? Urine trouble!"

"Late 9/11 joke. My dad died during 9/11. He was driving a plane."