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Joke of the Day

"Bank ads make me want to hide my money under my mattress. They also make me want to acquire some money for hiding, but that's a side issue."

"Cool things always happen when I don't have a camera."

"The cast of 16 & pregnant are the future cast of 32 & grandparents"

"A man sold his soul to the devil in order to get back the full head of hair he had as a young man. There was hell toupee."

"Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head is so far away from it's body."

"Me: Thank you! Cashier: You have a good one! Me: That's the rumor! Cashier: ..."

"What's the highest number in the world? 420"

"Kanye West must feel very conflicted right now. He's excited Kim is pregnant, but deep down he knows Beyonce had the best baby of all time."

"I lost my watch at a party... Saw a guy stepping on it while bullying a smaller dude. I walked up to the guy, and punched him. It's not okay to bully... not on my watch."

"It was a rainy day in California..."