158113

Joke of the Day

"He told her that trees blossom in her presence. What he meant was that she scares the sap back up into them."

"A Girl called me Daddy last night... So I told her I was going out to buy cigarettes and never came back."

"TIFU by reposting Just kidding. You fuckers love reposts."

"What's so weird about a steroid addiction? No matter what happens, the addiction always makes you stronger."

"What does a catholic eat at the movies? Pope-Corn"

"My friend recently got crushed by books. He's got his shelf to blame."

"A male unexploded landmine was in love with a female unexploded landmine and he said to her ... ""Hey baby, we should bang sometime."""

"Not sure, but I think I just got to 3rd base with my toothbrush."

"Madonna is tryin to get Spice Girls back together. Only condition is she gets to join them. They gonna call her Old Spice."

"Umm, no officer. I'm pretty sure that bag of weed fell out of YOUR pocket."