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Joke of the Day

"What's so weird about a steroid addiction? No matter what happens, the addiction always makes you stronger."

"I think my entire family is racist.. I was dating a white woman and eventually brought her to my home to meet my family. My wife and kids never even wanted to speak to her."

"Mom, can you take us to the maul? -teen bears, probably"

"How To Get Rich: 1. Place a Swear Jar next to Samuel L Jackson. 2. Empty it the next day. 3. Become a millionaire."

"What is the best way to watch the ""Saw"" films? In bits and pieces."

"Did you hear about the woman who used a fake name and married a renown psychologist? She committed Frued. Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week."

"Actually, until you cut into it it's chocolate *magma* cake. If you could just bring me a menu with the proper nomenclature that'd be great."

"Jessica fell out of a tree and broke both her arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Jessica"

"Two antennas get married... The ceremony was ok, But the reception was great!"

"Last week I ran out of toilet paper and only had a dollar so I bought a pack of gum at CVS. I haven't run out of receipt yet."