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Joke of the Day
"Schrodinger's Cat recently went on a crime spree He's wanted dead and alive"
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"Incest results in some very strange humans. That's why my sister and I ALWAYS use a condom."
"The British Pound? You mean the British Ounce."
"What do public toilets and homeless shelters have in common? They're both full of bums"
"I'm the guy at the gym laying face down on the treadmill telling everyone ""I'm ok, I'm ok"""
"What does the weather do when Hitler's around? It heils."
"Where there's a will there's an ""OMG! What's it say!? What does it say?""."
"Did you hear about the man that submitted all those entries to the pun contest? He was hoping one would take first place, but no pun in ten did."
"Autocorrect wants to capitalize bacon, out of respect."
"How many crackheads does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one more."