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Joke of the Day

"My New Years resolution was to not have any sex. Apparently"

"Why did the boy become an astronaut ? Because he was no earthly good !"

"Why are homosexuals so well dressed? Because they didn't just spend all that time in the closet doing nothing..."

"Why is 7 afraid of 8? It's not, numbers don't have emotions."

"My kids had a shirt made for me that says 'father of the year 2014 quarter finalist'."

"I have a gay friend but I never recognize him Because he is always in these guys."

"1,3,7,9 Were murdered last night What are the odds of that happening?"

"Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth?"

"Why is the bat-boy the luckiest guy on the baseball team? Because when he grows up he will be Batman."

"Don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining. I mean, c'mon. Let's spice it up a little. Aim for my chest and call me your ""naughty potty""."