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Joke of the Day
"I have The World's Greatest T-Shirt. See, it says so right on the front."
Next Joke
"I just changed my iPhone's name to ""Titanic"" and plugged it in. It's syncing now."
"I enjoy quaint, old-fashioned customs like being nice to people."
"You know it's time to quit smoking when you laugh at a tweet and you sound like Muttley."
"I made a knock-knock joke for ya Me: knock-knock You: Who's there? Me: DEAD NAZI! You:... Dead nazi who? Me: I bet you Dead Nazi that one coming."
"That bull you sold me is a lazy good-for-nothing! I told you he was a bum steer!"
"When you find a body beneath your floorboards is it face up or face down that's good luck?"
"When someone tries to hand me a flyer... ...it's kind of like saying ""Here, you throw this away."""
"What is OJ Simpson's password on his computer? Slash, slash, backslash, escape."
"What kind of music do phones love to hear? A symphony"