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Joke of the Day

"You know it's a shitty day at the office when Everytime you walk into the bathroom all the stalls are taken"

"I like my coffee like I like my women Basically, I'm now banned from Starbucks."

"Whats the difference between a crab with big boobs and a bus station full of punks? One is a busty crustacean and the other is a crusty bus station"

"Not to brag, but I have the high score on 7 different blood pressure machines around the city. *enters initials"

"I hate graph jokes... Because I can never get the point."

"How does a lawyer sleep? He rests his case..."

"Why was the drummer sad about his boring instruments? Because he had the doldrums."

"Just saw you on the beach and think you might look better in something that covers you a bit more. Like your car."

"Between Trump and Clinton, who is more likely to start a nuclear war if elected president? America, with the missiles aimed at ourselves."

"What do you call a psychic midget that just robbed a bank? Small medium at large"