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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between a crab with big boobs and a bus station full of punks? One is a busty crustacean and the other is a crusty bus station"

"My Donald J. Trump doll finally arrived. It was manufactured in China, then shipped to Russia for special handling."

"I'm having one of those days where I feel like the single soggy onion ring that somehow made it into an order of french fries."

"Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, ""Is it hot in here or is it just me?"" The other one looks at him and replies, ""HOLY SHIT, A TAKING MUFFIN!!"""

"What shoes do pedophiles wear? White Vans"

"Your mom.. has one arm, one leg, one titty, one eye, and one finger. They call her ""Uno"". Ironically enough, she also works at Ihop..."

"Trolling my FB friends by commenting ""Looking good ;)"" on solo pics of their husbands"

"What's Beethoven's favorite fruit? Ba-na-na-naaa!"

"A Limerick There once was a barmaid in Salles, On her chest wrote the price of ale. And on her behind, For the sake of the blind, Was the same information in Braille."

"Philosophical porn Person 1: Hey, why don't you watch philosophical porn? Person 2: Eh, it only appeals to a very Nietzsche fanbase."