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Joke of the Day

"Just saw you on the beach and think you might look better in something that covers you a bit more. Like your car."

"""Meetings"" What a Jamaican calls everything he owns."

"It's too beautiful to stay inside today. That's why I moved my bed closer to the window."

"Why was the dog banned from the redwood forest? He was barking up the wrong tree."

"When do Astronauts eat? Launch Time"

"Have you ever worked on a farm.. Because you sure know how to raise my cock!"

"A goldfish is a great pet if you're wanting to be forced to explain death to your toddler sometime within the next 48 hours."

"How does a French woman hold her liquor? By the ears."

"Whenever someone with a bumper sticker cuts me off I automatically dislike the cause they support. Right now I'm not too fond of Literacy"

"I was very disappointed to have to pay for my new roof. The builder had promised me it would be on the house."