154365

Joke of the Day

"Some guys think sweaters are sexy, but I don't like girls who sweat more than the usual amount."

"Why do women wear make up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink"

"Thanks for being the shoulder to put my head on.. Though being a conjoined twin does have its cons."

"Other than The Aristocrats, are there any jokes where the telling of it is the joke itself?"

"Hey, did you hear that I'm dating Carbon Monoxide? They're a little clingy though, it feels like they're suffocating me"

"Hi I'm Dan, welcome to identity theft club *from back of room ""me too"" ""me too!"" ""uhhh, yeah me too"" Ok, we're off to a great start guys"

"Really, 6 more inches of snow today. My front yard is getting more action than me."

"""Your resume lists the skills 'poor timing' & 'awkward'?"" Can I have a raise? ""We haven't hired you."" Oh. You're very handsome. ""I see."""

"Dear ladies who wear black tights and red shoes: Please stop. Minnie Mouse is not a style icon for grown women. Love, M"

"*Hulk smashes thru courtroom wall* SOMEONE ASK FOR INCREDIBLE WITNESS?! Judge- no, CREDIBLE! Hulk- shit HULK VERRY SORRY BOUT YOUR WALL"