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Joke of the Day

"So my friend told me that he has been constipated for the past three weeks... I'm pretty sure he's full of shit."

"Did you get that????? Unscramble these words! 1.) PNEIS 2.) HTIELR 3.) NGGERI 4.) BUTTSXE Did you get SPINE, LITHER, GINGER and SUBTEXT?"

"Every time I tie my shoe I feel like I'm giving a faraway sniper the go signal."

"If a regular frog says ""ribbit,"" what does a horny frog say? ""Rubbit."""

"Bee population worldwide is exploding. What a time to be a hive."

"WARDEN: You have been sentenced to the Electric Cher ME: in the what now *a metallic voice sings out: DO YOU BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER LOVE*"

"Why do ruler manufacturers make a big thing about them being shatterproof? Was there a ruler shattering epidemic that necessitated this?"

"Why does Michael J Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the best ingredients."

"Whats's Glenn's favourite restaurant? Popeyes"

"What happened to Casper the friendly ghost after his parents got divorced? His mom got soul custody."