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Joke of the Day

"So the woman sitting next to me on a plane with an infant in her lap looks over to me and asks, ""do you mind if I breast feed?"" And I respond, ""no thanks I already ate."" Too harsh of a dad joke?"

"I want to become a politician when I grow up so I've made a list of skills I want to aquire but I've only come up with one: Lying."

"Grading system for students in India: A - Average B - Below average C - Can't have dinner D - Don't come home F - Find a new family"

"Trainer: have you been sticking to your diet? Me: *tries to mumble yes but a chicken wing falls out of my mouth*"

"What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsh."

"GOD: Go forth, my tiny friends! ANTS: Hooray! ANGEL: Ok next creation ... The anteater. ANTS: The what now?"

"Did you hear pooh bear went gangsta? He doesn't even give a bother."

"The news report was that an elevator for the coal shaft broke down, trapping 27 workers But it was just a miner inconvenience"

"What do you call a small petition? Petite (Basin Tss)"

"What do you call a confused Asian? Disoriental."