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Joke of the Day

"How did the math teacher solve her constipation problem? She worked it out with a pencil."

"Why don't witches wear underwear? So they can get a better grip on the broom."

"What is the French verb that means ""To declare war""? *Surrendre*"

"I want to see a movie where a robot gains consciousness and realizes its a loser and doesn't want to do anything"

"What did the Pope say when a cougar crossed his path? Oh my gosh I almost Puma pants."

"How many Mexicans does it take to wax a car? 1 if you hit him just right"

"My boyfriend said to surprise him for his birthday so I moved all my stuff into his house while he was at work."

"What's the difference between r/circlejerk and r/The_Donald? No really. What is it?"

"[interview] BOSS: How many words can you type a minute? ME: Probably all of them BOSS: What do you mean? ME: Well, like for example, pickle"

"My roommates are concerned that I'm using all their kitchen utensils.. but that's a whisk i'm willing to take."