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Joke of the Day
"""Oh wow, way better!"" -Jedi Knight trying out a gun"
Next Joke
"Anyone watch story on the news about the corduroy pillows? It's making all the headlines."
"April is alcohol awareness month.....I think we're all aware. Cheers!"
"My doctor told me I had to stop masturbating. I asked, ""Why?"" He replied, ""Because I'm trying to examine you."""
"WIFE: You can't tell kids they're grounded anymore ME: Why not? W: They weren't our kids M: You did see how badly they packed our groceries?"
"I have mixed race parents, my dad prefers the 100m and my mom is Hispanic"
"What do you tell someone who constantly uses the word ""of"" instead of ""have""? Fuck of"
"What's the worst part about having Alzheimer's? To get to the other side"
"""Haha, Imagine Dragons. What a dumb band name."" -Neutral Milk Hotel fans"
"Apple once made an iPhone with a headphone jack... It was very 6S-ful"