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Joke of the Day

"My music teacher at school told me never to hit a drum again or I could get in serious trouble. I did, and he was right. There was serious re-percussions"

Next Joke
 
"What's the difference between a rooster and a hooker? [NSFW] The rooster says Cock-a-doodle-do, and the hooker says Any cock will do!"
"I just heard a dried up grape won the lottery, got a supermodel girlfriend and won a brand new car. I guess everything happens for a raisin."
"Lake Superior really needs to lose the attitude."
"Apparently people keep mistaking me for their Mirrors because they keep saying I'm ugly or fat"
"Good news: I learned how to build a fire. Bad news: I need a new toaster oven."
"(1:35pm) God: Yo Abraham (1:37pm) Abe: sup (1:38pm) God: Need u to kill ur son (1:42pm) Abe: k (4:02pm) God: jk lol (4:10pm) God: u there?"
"- Are you upset? Typing... Typing... Typing... Typing... - No."
"Whenever I hear an uninteresting 80 year old woman tell an uninteresting story I think, ""Wow, you must have been really hot."""
"What's Dave's favorite music genre? Meta."