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Joke of the Day
"Why were the police at the day care? Because some of the two-year-olds were resisting a rest."
Next Joke
"I'll do algebra, I'll put up with calculus, I'll even push through trigonometry... but graphing is where I draw the line!"
"Why don't blind people skydive? Because it scares the shit out of the dogs"
"I just want a woman that will look out for me while I'm shaking the vending machine"
"Bad is accidently sending your buddy a dirty sext intended for your girlfriend. Worse is getting 'lemme think about it' for a reply."
"The lights in my house love me... ...because I always turn them on."
"My grandad has the heart of a lion... ...and a lifetime ban from the Edinburgh zoo"
"Today I just turned 17! That makes me over 3.55 x 10^14 years old."
"What did one empty beer bottle say to the other? ""I'm drunk."""
"What do is the difference between acne and a pedophile? Acne doesn't come on your face until you're twelve"