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Joke of the Day

"So a girl asked me if I was a tits or an ass man.. so I said, well my friends always tell me, ""You're an ass, man!"" Ba dum tiss."

"If Claudia Schiffer married Brains from The Thunderbirds, she would become Claudia Schiffer-Brains. Claudia Shit for brains."

"If a tree falls on a woman... And nobody is around to hear it. Why was there a tree in the kitchen?"

"What does the sign of an out of business brothel say? Beat it. We're closed."

"Jokes on her! I LIKE sleeping on the couch."

"*KNOCK KNOCK* OPEN UP ITS THE POLICE ""What do you want?"" YOU'RE UNDER ARRES- ""No."" ..NO?? ""No, I don't want to be."" *whispers* Shit now what"

"What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinners on me!"

"What is a Catholic priest's dream second job? Warden at juvenile detention center."

"Why do computer programmers confuse Christmas and Halloween? Because OCT 31 = DEC 25."

"Eating at this new Hitler-themed breakfast place, Luftwaffles."