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Joke of the Day

"When you need Advice everyone is ready to help.....But when you need Help everyone only gives advice...!!!!"

"Doctor Doctor I need something to keep my falling hair in What about a matchbox !"

"A man went to a fish and chip lunch organised by the local monastery... He strolls up to one guy serving, and with a big grin, asks ""Are you the fish friar?"" The guy responds ""No, I'm the chip monk!"""

"Did you hear about the paperboy who masturbated on the job? It was all over the news! (Can't remember where I heard this, so sorry if its a repost)"

"[2005, youtube's first pitch meeting] ok so basicaly its like if america's funniest home videos was on 24 hrs a day on evrey computer-- SOLD"

"I grew a beard thinking it would say ""Distinguished Gentleman."" Instead, turns out it says, ""Senior Discount, Please!"""

"I before e except after c Weird science"

"What did the messed up psychologist have for dinner? Freud rice."

"What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot you racist"

"How come jokes about Blacks and Hispanics aren't funny? Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal"