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Joke of the Day

"""Give it to me"" she screamed ""Give it to me I'm so fucking wet!"" But try as she might, she wasn't getting my umbrella."

"At what age are musicians the loudest? Forte"

"What is the difference between a priest and a pimple? A pimple waits until you are 13 to come on your face."

"Lyrics in modern hip hop are so bad.."

"I have a ""Knock Knock"" joke but you have to start it off."

"Texting while driving: Bad. Wrestling a shark while driving: STILL LEGAL! WOOHOOO!!!"

"Flight Attendant: Would you like some headphones? Man: Yes, and how did you know my name was Phones?"

"My 7 year old daughter drops this joke on me. What kind of bee's make milk? Boo-bee's"

"[briefing] CIA DIRECTOR: We have a leak... CIA PLUMBER: (slowly stands up) CIA DIRECTOR: In our operation. CP: (slowly sits back down)"

"Someone broke into my house last night and left a note saying they'd broken one of my keyboard keys. I onder hich one."