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Joke of the Day

"*holding a glass of white wine with 2 hands like it's a mug of hot cocoa*"

"Jesus walks into a bar No he didn't, because he isn't real."

"Two wind turbines are having a paddle 1: What's your thoughts on renewable energy? 2: I'm a big fan."

"I tell pissed off women to ""calm down"" So yeah, I'm into extreme sports."

"BEANS & ONIONS Q: What do you get when you mix beans and onions? A: Tear gas."

"I never close my eyes in the shower because that's how murderers know when to show up and kill you."

"Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 7.. His response was ""I still love Vista, baby!"""

"Why don't women drink beer at the beach? Because they'll get sand in their Schlitz."

"What do you call a man who can't stand? Neal"

"This morning I woke up confused and in the dark. Then it dawned on me."