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Joke of the Day

"No thanks, NASCAR. If I wanted to spend 8 hrs watching a car drive around in a big circle, I'd go on a road trip with my mom."

"How does one make a Nazi? With a ropesy."

"What's the difference between a gay and a microwave.... You can't brown a sausage in a microwave"

"Why do cows wear bells? Their horns don't work."

"What happened when the cow jumped over the barbed wire fence? Utter destruction."

"If Jason Bateman had a servant... Would his servant call him Master Bateman?"

"What do you call it when you thrust a hairy pole in and out of your mouth, and at the end you spit out a white liquid? Brushing your teeth!"

"I've recently begun living with a horse. At first, I was worried the smell might be a problem But, you know what? He doesn't seem to mind"

"What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you fucking racist."

"I just heard Bill is interested in Hillary again... She's barely legal..."