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Joke of the Day

"Some scientists believe the ability to create language was because we ate so much meat as primates. That's why vegans can only say ""i'm vegan""."

Next Joke
 
"ME: Um, I specifically requested Mary. BLOODY CARLA: Listen, do you want your eyes clawed out or not?"
"Tried to pick a booger off my phone screen. Ended up calling my mom, signing up for AOL and getting an online degree in refrigerator repair"
"The universe implodes.... No matter."
"Just got a great deal on some bottled water. The store was having a liquidation sale."
"America is still a British colony In England we speak English In France we speak French In Germany we speak German In China we speak Chinese In America we speak English *drops mic and leaves*"
"*stands up and screams* ""PICTURES OR IT DIDN'T HAPPEN!"" *gets thrown out of Easter service during sermon of the resurrection*"
"Why did the leper crash his car? He left his foot on the accelerator."
"What do a pimp and a cowboy have in common? They both know how to throw a ho-down."
"What music is good to listen to while having a snack? 8 a bit music."