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Joke of the Day

"Everybody is trying to make Harambe jokes, and they are all really bad... But I'm going to take a shot at it."

"Do you remember that barbeque you had? The one where I had my meat all up on your grill?!?!?!"

"With the brexit news, they say the pound is failing. They're calling it the ounce, now."

"Why do you really not want to get pulled over in Ireland? Because the cops are Dublin the fines! (It took me a three hour car ride to come up with this... I am not a clever person)"

"25% of twitter users are on medication for mental illness, which means 75% are running around untreated."

"Whats the best place to drive to in Iowa? The Middle. That way, you're always driving out of Iowa."

"40 Theoretical physicists walk into a bar Or did they?"

"I don't understand why women programmers are mad when male programmers objectify their body.... After all, it is object oriented programming."

"I was cured of lycanthropy. Now I'm a were-wolf."

"When Peter Rabbit was working as a porn star, whom did his contract require to be on the set? Fluffer Bunny."