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Joke of the Day

"A man asked me how easy it was to contract HIV... I handed him an address and told him to stop by after dusk with a casque of Cognac and ask for the Honeybadger."

"I don't like drug tests... They're not my cup of pee."

"What's the difference between a Pokemon Go player and a Facebook user?? Pokemon Go players are only wasting their own time ;)"

"[having sex] Me: CHECK IT OUT NO HANDS! Her: USE YOUR HANDS! Me: *raises the roof*"

"How many Jews can fit in a car? 2 In the front, 2 in the back, and six million in the ash tray! *Drops mic* *Gets shot*"

"A frittata is just an omelette that studied abroad for a year in college."

"Patriots new theme song [could it be anything else?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uuzmub5PXNQ)"

"In China the labels read, ""Made by someone you know."""

"The year is 2020. Hip hop has fully merged with dubstep, creating the genre of music known as Dubhop. All hope for mankind is lost"

"What do you get when you cash in your memes for karma? A dank statement."