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Joke of the Day
"If you see a glass as half empty, pour it into a smaller glass."
Next Joke
"What did one snowman say to the other? Smells like carrots!"
"What kind of computer is optimized for sad songs? A Dell."
"Wife: Are you still tweeting about me being in labor? Me: Now I'm live tweeting ""The Walking Dead."" Wife: Me: Everything isn't about you."
"What's worse than a puppy nailed to a tree? A puppy nailed to 7 trees."
"Boy says this to girl Boy: No word can describe how beautiful you are Girl: Awwwww Boy: But a number can, 2/10"
"So I just saw the music video for Radioactive, and if you think fighting stuffed animals is weird... ...Imagine Dragons."
"From my 6yo Me (after having taught her subtraction): ""So, what's the difference between 10 and 5?"" ""They're just two different numbers!"""
"Why are bears so hairy ? They don't have salons in the jungle !"
"What would you call Macaulay Culkin if he was black? Homie alone"