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Joke of the Day

"What did one snowman say to the other? Smells like carrots!"

"What did Kobe Bryant's teamates say to him while he was scoring 81 points? ""I'M FUCKING OPEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"""

"Yesterday, I got a fortune cookie that said: ""Help! I'm stuck in a cookie factory!!!"""

"I try to be a good sport, but sometimes I'm badminton."

"SCIENTIST: it's our thinnest toilet paper yet, sir. less than a picometer CEO: *rips it by breathing on it* put it in every public restroom"

"If my teacher saw me staring at her from behind Then I was staring at her ass"

"How do you stop a dog from barking in July? Shoot him in June."

"Newspapers are cool because you can cut out eye holes and spy on people. Try that with an iPad."

"He said: ""Tell me Baby...am I your first?"" She said: ""What? Like...today?"""

"An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman decided to have a BBQ. The Englishmen brought some meat, the Irishman brought some whiskey and the Scotsman brought some dude from Aberdeen."