100523

Joke of the Day

"Why did the shark cross the Great Barrier Reef? ...To get to the other tide! Shark Week Hoo Ha Ha!"

"I swallowed a Watch the other day... Now I'm just trying to pass the time."

"Took the shell off my racing snail to see if I could make it go faster... Just made it a bit sluggish."

"[Christmas] 6:30kids are excited 7:30kids are playing 8:00kids are fighting 9:00kids are crying 9:15wife is yelling 9:30I am drinking"

"Why did the vengeful fireman lose his job? He tried fighting fire with fire."

"bones found on the moon..... ....apparently the cow didn't make it ?"

"My nickname at work is ""HR wants to see you"""

"Do you guys wanna jear a hoke about dyslexics? I had a joke about Alzheimer's but damnit, I don't remember it."

"I saw some guy stealing a gate last night... I thought not to shout at him cuz he might take a fence."

"Just been up in the loft getting the Christmas tree down, and I found a present from last year which we must have forgotten to give to the kids... ...shame really, they would have loved a kitten."