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Joke of the Day

"Q: What is the difference between a violin and a viola? A: A viola burns longer."

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"Which spice is the worst at keeping secrets? Only thyme will tell."
"What did the photocopier say about its favorite purchased song? That's my pay-per jam."
"What country does every one called Andy come from? Peru, because it's the home of the Andes!"
"I hate it when.. I hate it when my black friend disappears in the dark, My white friend in snow, My Chinese friend in sand, And my Middle-Eastern friend in drone strikes."
"What's the difference between my dick and a motorcycle? Your mom hasn't ridden a motorcycle"
"Loads of people are lining up to buy my vampire teeth. Fang queue."
"TOA! The Transvestites of America want to wish everyone a happy holiday season, remember to eat, drink, and be Mary."
"What's 18 inches and makes women SCREAM? A stillborn."
"How fast can a woman fuck? 68km/h, because at 69 she flips over and blows a rod."