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Joke of the Day
"Have you ever tried eating a clock. Nobody has time for that."
Next Joke
"I just held the door open for an Asian guy. He said, ""Sank you,"" so I punched him in the face. I can't believe he brought up Pearl Harbor like that."
"What did the chef say when he was skipped in rotation? Hey that's my toque!!"
"What do you call an arcade game that involves you hitting avocados that pop out of the top of it? Guac-A-Mole."
"DOCTOR: ""Ok, now PUSH!"" WOMAN IN LABOUR: ""Should I be doing this in my state?"" DR: [leaning out of car window] ""Less talky, more pushy."""
"My friend just got a pool table for Christmas so he gave me a call inviting me around for a pool tournament with the boys. I said thanks for the invite but I prefer to pool by myself."
"If you want to surrender, what do you do? Become french"
"What does a grizzly wear under his fur? Under-bear."
"Roma menstruation Q. What's the best thing about a Gypsy on her period? A. When you finger her you get your palm red for free."
"On this Fourth of July, just remember... He who comes forth with a fifth on the Fourth, may not come forth on the Fifth."