149393

Joke of the Day

"Your mom and a washing machine... Whats the difference between your mom and a washing machine?? The washing machine doesnt follow me around for a week after I drop a load in it..."

"""Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your front door forever."""

"I was homeschooled so my back to school pics were of me standing in front of the house before I went back inside."

"I don't believe my friend's story about the time he fit a whole watermelon up his ass. It's just too much of a stretch."

"I wanted to be a tailor. But I didn't suit the job."

"Let's all take a moment to honor National Punctuation Day because life would be: very, confusing! Without it?"

"Why does Noddy wear a giant red hat with a yellow tinkling bell on the end of it? Because he's a cunt."

"My brothel has no regular customers... People just cum and go."

"I'm special. My school told me so."

"Sometimes I can't tell if I'm looking at a captcha or a text from my mom."